Elevator Do’s and Don’ts

I went to the Tower Club on the 33rd floor of Philamlife (or is it Insular Building) in Makati today for the board meeting of the Women’s Business Council.

In the dozen of times I’ve taken their elevator, it’s always full during lunch time. When my meeting is in the evening, minsan I would be the only one there.

Today was busy. I didn’t have to wait because the moment I arrived, the elevator door opened.

I find it annoying when people engage in conversations inside the elevator oblivious of their surroundings.

My ride today from ground to 33rd:
Guy————- A yay, nasuka sya, nakakaloka.
Gay————- Marami daw, nakita mo ba?

(Dyos ko, why do they have to over-analyze her suka whoever she is. I am losing my appetite.)

Another group (same elevator)

Girl———– Na heart attack sya last week. Pumunta ba kayo?
Girl 2——— Cremated, si Paolo nakita.
Boy———— Ang kintab ng kabaong ni JB. Mukhang mahal.
Boy2———– Malaki ang nakuha nyang bonus.

(My God, yung bonus ibinili ng kabaong na mamahalin?)

When inside the elevator, please refrain from engaging in any kind of conversation.
If what you’re going to say is urgent, limit to one or two sentences. Then continue when you’re out. It’s only a few minutes ride anyway.

Be aware that it’s a short ride. If you want to go kissing-kissing with your partner, make it as quick as a lightning. Tsup tsup finish. Do not engage in French kiss complete with tongue scrimmage. Hello, the door is open and I am waiting here and watching you. Nakakainis yang mga ganyan, Nang-iinggit.

Ladies, do not use the elevator door as a make-up mirror. Meron yung idinidilat pa yung mata while the rest of us watched.

Ladies, pls do not fix your bra while using the shiny elevator door’s reflection as mirror. Paling nga yung d e d e mo but fix it later, go to the ladies room. We could see you.

Ladies, please note that while you stand, there may be people standing behind you. Do not scratch your butt.