Goodbye Father Jonil Lalap

I got a call this morning from Father Bok, the priest who comes to our showroom in Makati every first friday morning to celebrate mass.

He said our friend Father Jonil Lalap has passed away and last lamay is tonight at Don Bosco in Canlubang.

The last time I contacted Fr. Jonil was on January 21. Basta bigla ko syang naalala and tinext ko sya, kinumusta ko. He responded by saying he’s at the Makati Medical Center. I didn’t get to visit him naman. Kasi malungkot. I didn’t want to see him looking frail, helpless, sick. Now I am full of regret. I should’ve brought him some goodies and said hi to him.

I will certainly miss a very good friend. I ran to him a few times before when I was feeling so low and distraught. I never go to friends when I have problems. But I did that twice with Fr. Jonil. One time Edmund and I fought over the phone over something petty. I felt so offended by the tone of his voice. Maybe it was not what he said but more of the tone of his voice.

I didn’t want to go home that night because I was so angry at my husband. My tears flowed uncontrollably. I went to Batangas at 8 pm to see Fr. Jonil. Nagkaligaw-ligaw pa kami kasi napaka bright and smart nung driver ko nuon. Pagsinabing ikaliwa, ikakanan, pag sinabing mag-u-turn, ide-deretso.
I waited for Fr. Jonil who came from a mass in a barrio. I only stayed in his office for less than an hour. I cried like there was no more tomorrow. I wasn’t sure if Fr. Jonil understood my drama eh una, wala naman syang asawa. Pangalawa, mas bata sya sa akin, baka kako ma-stress pa sya.

After that crying episode, I no longer went to see him to pour out my problems and stresses. I didn’t want to bother him with my worries.

EVery now and then he would text me and make kumusta. Oftentimes he would send me morning prayers to help me start my day with strength and fortitude. Sobrang natyetyempo, when I am feeling so low, bigla syang magte-text. Siguro he could sense my innermost feelings.

Then one night at past 11 pm, he sent me a message asking how I was doing. he said he’s always praying for me. Then I asked him “how are you father? I hope you’re fine”. He replied by saying that he’s stick. That he has cancer, stage 4″.

I prayed for him and wished him well. I was hoping he would beat the odds and fully recover.

No he didn’t.

I cried this morning feeling confused. When we are troubled, good priests pray for us and help us be strong thru their prayers and advice.

People like to say that getting sick of a serious disease is karma. Because the person did something bad. Do you believe in that? Maybe, all of us adults have done something bad at least once, twice, a dozen times in our lives. Kaya meron tayong problems and sakit, karma daw. But how about the newborn baby I’ve seen on facebook a few days ago. Some demonic woman wrangled the baby on a pail of water. The little baby was of course helpless. The only thing he/she could do was frantically cry. Then what? After a few minutes, it stopped breathing. Is that karma? What was the baby’s sin against humanity? Bakit sya na-karma? Ridiculous right?

I just couldn’t help but cry over Fr. Jonil’s passing. I have very few true friends, maybe less than a dozen, less than ten, or less than 5, Fr. Jonil was one of them.

Thank you Fr. for being a friend to me. Thank you for the daily prayers you offered for my family’s well-being. I am truly sorry for not visiting you last month. Please continue to include me in your prayers even when you’re already in heaven. Salamat po.

Photo taken on December 18, 2008