The Life Story of Noel Oliva

After the one hour dance exercise, Noel Oliva freshened up and used our powder room. I saw him and his friend Jeff Lirio alternately taking pictures of each other inside the toilet. I offered to take their photo together.

Afterwards, Noel Oliva sat down with me for half hour while sharing his life story to serve as inspiration to others.

Noel with friend Jeff Lirio, a math teacher)

HIS BEGINNINGS

Noel is the 9th children in a brood of 10. His father was from Tabon, one of the main islands of Binangonan, Rizal, while his mother was from Bae, Laguna.

Since his parents had many children already, he was adopted by Ka Cresing, a sister of his father Eusebio Oliva. Ka Cresing was unmarried with no children.

Noel was sent to the town proper for schooling. From Pateros Catholic College, he continued his education at the Meralco Foundation because according to him, he really loved to dance. I was not sure if this was the reason why he went to Meralco Foundation, maybe they offered dance classes.

He spent the years 1987 to 1998 dancing because that’s his passion and that’s what he knew best. He joined dance contests in Eat Bulaga, Lunch Date, department store contests, etc. He also became the favorite and most respected dance coach in our town for debuts, cotillions, alumni presentations, weddings, ballroom dancing, which provided him with a steady stream of income.

I asked him when did he find out he was gay.
“Maliit pa ako mam, alam ko na na beki ako”
“Anong beki?”
“Bakla”.
“Teenager ka pa lang, elementary?”
“Five years old pa lang ako mam, bakla na ako”

When he mentioned the word beki, I immediately looked at his cheeks to see if they were swollen.
Ang alam ko lang na beke ay nung maliit ako, pag namamaga ang pisngi ko, lalagyan ng mama ko ng kulay asul na tinta, yung hinahalo sa Liwayway gawgaw. Kasi daw yun ang gamot sa beke. Ang boys daw pagnagka beke hindi na magkaka anak.

His mother Ka Cresing was a graduate of cosmetology and dressmaking from Samson Technology.
“Kindergarten pa lang dinadamitan na ako ng mommy ng pang-girls.
Omb—— “Baka kaya ka naging bakla. Baka akala mo kasi girl ka”.

Noel said he just knew he was different.

“Hindi madame, talagang five years old pa lang ako tumitili-tili na ako sa plaza.
Pagnanonood ako ng basketball, sobra akong maka tili, iba. Ayyyyy”.

Omb——-“Never ka nagka crush sa girl?”
Noel——“Never. Friends friends lang”.

Omb——-“Puro boys ang gusto mo. Na brokenhearted ka na? Yung serious talaga?”

HIS LOVE STORY

He met a boy, younger than him, who was only in third year high school. Noel helped support his studies until after graduating from college. Their relationship was serious, or so Noel thought.

On Ka Cresing’s first death anniversary, Noel went to church to pray for her.
While there, he said he saw flashes of his adoptive mother talking to him.
“Noel, tigilan mo na yan” referring to his relationship with the boy.
In his prayer, he assured his mother that the boy loved him and Noel would be fine”.

On his way out of the church, he saw the aunt of his boyfriend (codenamed TM) . The aunt told Noel: “Noel, may anak na si TM. Tingnan mo ang pictures sa Facebook ko”.

Noel’s body shook from shock. He went home crying.
“Wala ako dating facebook, kaya ako nagka facebook para makita yung mga litrato”.
“Nadun nga, mag-iisang taon na yung bata”.

As expected, his boyfriend vehemently denied having fathered a son with a Bicolana he met in college. Noel realized and accepted that his mother was right all along. That this boy didn’t really love him but was only there for the benefits. With so much pain in his heart, Noel accepted that he could never be a woman to give him a child, and that they could never have the same relationship as a married couple. With a firm resolve, Noel split with TM.

After two months, Noel found out that his former boyfriend fathered another child during his relationship with Noel, this time with a town mate.

to be continued.