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OMB Tweets #15 - Oh My Buhay

1.
Omb——–“I want in the new wing and with a view. Last week you gave me a room without a view”.
Front Desk–“Yes mam, we have a premier room, with two beds. Is that okay with you?”
Omb——–“Okay lang, pero isa lang ako”.
Front Desk- “Oh, isa ka lang mam, I see”.
Front Desk- How about a queen and a twin bed?”

Omb——–“Isa lang ako. Okay lang”.
Front Desk- “We have a king bed”.
Omb———“kahit nga ano, okay lang”.

2. Pagkakain nyo ibili mo uli ako ng hash brown, tatlo, hash brown, ihatid mo sa room ko para makuha mo yung pera pambili ng concrete steps.

Driver text: “Mam dito na ko harap pinto mo”.

I opened the door:
“Kanina ka pa ba dyan?
Driver—–“kanina pa mam”.
“Eh bakit hindi ka kumakatok, malabsa na yang hash brown”.

“Sa susunod, kakatok ka.

hash brown mcdo

3. O eto ang listahan ng bibilhin mo, ipadeliver mo agad, kung kulang yung pera, idadaan mo na lang kamo mamaya. Bumili ka ng dalawang pirasong clear plastic na bubong para sa trellis”.

After two hours. Text: “Mam, anong size nung bubong? 2 inches, 8 or 10 inches?”

Omb——-“hello, anong size ba meron?”
Driver—-“Ay eto nga mam, tinatanong kung anong size daw ang gusto nyo, two inches ang haba, eight, twelve inches”.
Omb——-“Inches? alam mo ba ang hitsura ng bubong?
Driver—- “Oo mam”.
Omb——–“nakikita mo ba kung gaano kalaki o kahaba ang mga bubong? Bakit two inches?”
Driver—-“Yan mam ang sabi two inches o twelve inches”.
Omb——-“Meron kayong bubong sa bahay ano? alam mo ba kung gaano kaliit ang two inches? Twelve inches kasing haba ng ruler”.
Driver—-Baka nga mali mam, baka twenty meters”.

4. Omb——–“Ano’ng klaseng isda yan?”
Fish stall owner—- “Masarap yan”.

maya maya fish

Omb————“Ano’ng isda yan?”
Fish stall owner—–“Ay masarap talaga yan”.
Omb———— “Anong tawag dyan sa isda?”
Fish stall owner——“Maya-maya, masarap yan talaga”.

(pls listen to the question, answer it first, before giving unsolicited info)

5. Omb——-“Magkano ang total bill ng Explorer ng DTI”.
Staff—–“Marami kasi mam inayos”.
Omb——-“So magkano ang inabot”.
Staff——“May mga pyesa daw na pinalitan”.
Omb——–“Ang tanong ko, magkano ang bill nila?”

(pls listen to the question, answer it first, before giving additional info)

6. Omb——- Meron ba kayong paint for exterior wood?”
Store clerk—— “Meron mam, eto”.
Omb——–Latex, di ba for cement and metal yan?”
Store clerk—— “Pwede mam sa concrete”.
Omb——–“Ipe-paint ko sa labas, dapat rain or shine, for wood protection”.
Store clerk——-“Eto mam, rain or shine”.
Omb——– “Bakit nakalagay elastomeric, di ba para sa bubong yan?”
Store clerk—- “Epoxy”.
Omb——– “Yung pang outdoor paint for wood. Di ba enamel ang sa wood?”
Store clerk—— “Pwede mam, rain or shine”.

roof paint

7. Omb—— “Nag-i-install ba kayo? Wala kasi akong mauutusan na mag-install”.
Sales clerk—-“yes mam, saan ba kayo?’
Omb——-“Dyan lang. malapit dito”.
Sales clerk—–“Tatawag kayo sa office namin, sila kasi ang nag-i-schedule”.
Omb——–“Mga ilang days?”
Sales clerk——-“Sa office mam ang nag-i-schedule. Bibilhin nyo muna, tapos at saka pupunta yung magkakabit”.
Omb——–“Kinabukasan?”
Sales clerk—–“Hindi ko masabi mam, siguro mga ilang buwan”.
Omb——–“Buwan? Tatlo, anim?”
Sales clerk——“Pwede. Gusto nyo bilhin nyo na lang, kayo na ang magkabit”.

CCTV camera kit

8. There’s a new driver (testing palang). I noticed that he likes to scratch. While he’s driving, he would scratch his head, or touch his nose, scratch his cheek. Every time I would call his attention on his driving, he would scratch his head. Every time there’s a car that whizzed past us, he would scratch his head, etc. I feel itchy every time I see him scratching. After 7 days of observing, I broke my silence
“Bakit kamot ka ng kamot. Hindi ka ba nagsa-shampoo?”
Driver——- “Hindi mam”.
Omb———- “Ano? Hindi ka nagsa-shampoo, naliligo ka ba?”
Driver——-“Oo naman mam, naliligo ako pero hindi talaga ako nagsa-shampoo”.

scratching driver

9. Townmate——“Hello, Madame, kumusta?
Omb———“O…okay naman, thank you”.
Townmate—–“Iimbitahin sana kita sa birthday ko”.
Omb———-“Happy birthday”.
Townmate—–“Madame, May kaunti akong handa sa bahay. Maliit lang ang bahay namin, hindi palasyo, kaunti lang ang pagkain. Tayu-tayo lang. Inimbita ko yung mga kumare ko, mga classmate, ka batch, ka born again ko, at mga kasamahan ko sa ……”. Hindi gaanong masarap ang pagkain.
Omb———–“Salamat pero hindi ako pwede”.

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