OMB Tweets # 64

1. More people are looking for mangkukulam. Sorry for the nth time, wala akong kilalang mangkukulam.

“nangkukulam din ho ba sya? my wife cheated on me while i’m out of the country. halos mamatay matay ako sa pagtatrabaho sa middle east tapos nalaman ko ako pa pala nagpapalamon sa boyfriend nya”.

“Can I have the number of mangkukulam pls…I am willing to pay.tnx”

HI po, I need to get the cel#, badly needed to save our marriage life

2. It was 6 pm, I was looking for a place to eat. I was supposed to go to Chipotle but I missed the turn. When I made a U-turn, I saw Olive Garden right beside the parking lot so for convenience, I decided to go there instead. There were at least 40 people waiting for tables. I asked the reception how long was the wait, she said 45 minutes. When I told her “I am alone and I don’t mind sitting at the bar” she led me to a one meter wide counter beside the bar but lower than the bar. It may be for little children.

Two ladies ordered this alcoholic drinks. I took a photo and I pretended the margarita was for me. Pa-cool.

In actual, this was my drink. Tap water.

3. I wanted to eat the tofu soup at the Chinese buffet but I missed the cut-off by two minutes. From 11 am to 3:30 pm. the buffet price is $8.95. From 3:31 onwards, the price goes up by $4 to $12.95. I wanted to park closest to the restaurant’s entrance door because it was raining so it took me a few minutes longer. I thought it was okay but the receptionist didn’t want to take me in for lunch. She said it was already dinner time. I left. I just wanted hot soup because it was cold and gloomy. One time naman I walked in at 3:45 and she said it’s still lunch time.

I couldn’t think of a better place to have hot soup. I saw Red Lobster at the end of the street so I thought maybe they have hot soup.

I saw a combo in the menu, soup and salad. That’s what I ordered. They gave me a large bowl of clam chowder soup that’s creamy and with lots of potatoes, and a small bowl of salad with 5 pieces of shrimps.

4. There were three Filipina ladies dining together about one table away from where I was seated. I couldn’t see their faces, only their hair. But I could hear their voices and what they were talking about. It was fairly quiet at 4 pm. When the waiter brought their bill, they told the waiter to split it into three. Suggestion, dapat the minute you order, tell the waiter to take your orders separately to make it easier for the waiter. During rush hours, waiters here move with precision and speed, nakakahiyang abalahin, unless you intend to give 20% tip. But since you are splitting the bill, that means you are frugal and will most likely not give a big tip.

5. After my soup and salad lunch, I drove to Costco to buy some of my food supply.

Whoa, first time I’ve seen them selling something this expensive. $160,000 diamond ring plus 9% tax = $174,400 x P50 = P8,720,000. There’s another one for $220,000 + 9% tax = $239,800 x P50/dollar = $11,990,000. Sino kaya ang bibili nyan? Ang mga ganyan kayaman, nagsa-shopping kaya sa Costco para makatipid ng few dollars on tissue paper?

6. I was tempted to sit down and try the heavy duty massager machine they were demoing. I wanted to try but not to buy. My legs hurt and I wanted to get a free massage pero sinukluban ako ng guilty feelings. I’ve seen several women sitting there and saying “oooh ahhh that feels good”. Pero hindi rin naman bibili.

7. I found some sugar cane (tubo) in Mi Pueblo supermarket. Naalala ko tuloy ang papa ko. Nung maliit pa ako, pagpumupunta kami sa Ongpin, he always stopped to buy a cup of freshly pressed ice cold sugar cane juice. Ang sarap, ang lamig, ang tamis. Siguro kaya sya nagka diabetes.

8. I waited in line for about 15 minutes to buy champurrado only to find out it was not the champorado that I know, eto hot chocolate lang pala. Walang kanin.

Mexican’s champurrado is actually hot chocolate drink.

9. I wanted to try their food. I ordered tacos and ceviche. They were both good but too messy to eat. The ingredients fell off before reaching my mouth.

10. I felt a sense of community cooperation when I saw women and men giving free gift wrapping for a small donation to school fund / charity.

I thought that was a nice but simple way to help. See? One doesn’t have to be wealthy to do something good.

The best things in life are not things, but people like you.

I hope you all received a wrapped gift. A hug, a kiss from your loved one, a prayer from people who care and good wishes from the perfect stranger, me.