Samu’t sari

1.
Omb——— Ano yung mabaho? Parang may basahan na mabaho.
Antonia—– Wala mam, wala ako’ng naamoy.
Omb——— Meron, baka nagpunas ka dito ng basahan na marumi.
Antonia—– Hindi mam, malinis yung basahan, nilabhan ko.

After a few minutes,
Omb——— Meron talaga akong naaamoy. Baka ikaw Antonia?
Antonia—– Naligo ako mam.
Omb——— Baka yang damit mo?

She smelled it.
Antonia—– Mabango mam. Naglagay ako ng cologne, ang bango nga.
Omb——— Yung cologne mabango, pero yang damit mo?

Not content, I smelled the lower bottom of her pink shirt.
Antonia—– Hindi mam ako, ang ganda ng baro ko.
Omb——— Oh my god Antonia, ang baho ng blouse mo, magpalit ka nga. Hindi mo ba alam kung ano ang mabaho?

2. Nagkasalubong kami ng janitor sa office. Instead of greeting me good morning mam, he moved his two eyes and brows up and down. Close siguro kami.

3. I went to the sales office. I caught field sales consultants busy playing computer games on their cellphones. I controlled my mouth. I wanted to say, “if you stop that, you would be able to sell more”.

4. I noticed a guy sitting by himself in the showroom. I asked him who’s he waiting for? He’s waiting for one of the Sales supervisors. I normally do not ask for the details, but ewan ba ang tsismosa ko talaga.
He wants to get a certification that he bought the Ford Everest from Ford EDSA kasi daw he would declare it carnapped because he hasn’t seen it for more than a month now. Last time he saw it was at their garage. Baka daw ibinenta ng misis nya.
Apparently, he works abroad and sends money to his wife for payment of the vehicle but she used the money for something else. Aside from that, marami silang issues na mag-asawa.

4. We’re selling our 10 year old Ford Expedition. Our garage has no more space, Two vehicles have the same coding day, they have the same color too. That’s why we need to let go of one.

A fashion designer came over to look at the vehicle. I asked our driver to assist him. The fellow wanted to check if the power windows, door locks are working perfectly. Our driver suffered from gender confusion.
Our driver D ———– “Mam, okay ho yan, eh sir”.
Designer————– “Para saan itong switch na ito?”
Driver D————— “Sir, para dito, eh mam”.
Designer————— “Dito ba?”
Driver D————— “Sir, dito ho yan mam”.

5. Our people like to order food delivery. I was leaving when I saw this guy, Roldan Soriano, kala ko the food is for me.
Guys, please make sure you give tips.

6. At least a thousand people were patiently and impatiently waiting to ride the MRT at the corner of EDSA and Pasong Tamo. Kawawa talaga sila. They said it takes an hour to one and a half just to get to the top to get tickets. I wish I have the power to help all this people.

7. Instead of a 15 ride home, it becomes a daily two hours. Sayang gasolina, sayang ang pera, sayang ang oras. Dagdag pollution sa Metro Manila.

What did Secretary Abaya suggests? Ride the MRT? Sige nga, ikaw nga ang pumila ng dalawang oras sa tabi ng kalye, ulan, araw at usok?