When my children were small, I thought as long as they have milk, food, no sipon or lagnat, walang sugat, then they would be okay. I thought my kisses were enough to heal their wounds, I thought my mere touch on their forehead would vanish their fever. I thought my tight hugs were enough to protect them from any kind of harm. That nothing could go wrong. Because I am here, their mother. I thought my love was enough.
No. I was wrong, very wrong.
They have to live outside of my womb. Outside of my embrace. Outside in the jungle called real world. They have to learn things on their own. They have to interact with strangers, not just with me.
I thought by making sure they graduate from college, they would be okay. I thought the best way to protect them was to give them a good education. But I was wrong. Again, very wrong.
They’re now adults and have their own minds. It’s not always that they would care to listen to what I am saying. Young people like to prove themselves. They think they can do things better. They listen more from people who they thought are friends but actually foes.
How can I teach them to identify a true friend from a foe when I myself could also make that mistake? How does one teach their kids to read danger signs, if they didn’t want to listen because they thought listening to friends was better?
My husband told me I taught them too much– to be kind always. They are kind, very. But I forgot to teach them that not all people are kind.
They have to learn how to protect and defend themselves from the harsh realities of life. It’s a jungle out there.
The gullible are eaten alive.
A mother’s love is not enough to always make things right for them. And I won’t be around forever. I can’t. One day, I won’t be here anymore. I will leave my love behind but that won’t be enough.
Ms Annie I am deeply touched by your love for your children. I too am a mother but I am not as loving as you. i will try to be more loving.
Ms Annie.. Pls don’t be too harsh on urself.. Mothers will always be Mothers to their children, no matter how old they may get.. When things seem difficult for our kids, we, as Moms, tend to question ourselves : HAVE I RAISED THEM WELL ENOUGH? HAVE I TAUGHT THEM THE PROPER TECHNIQUES ON HOW TO CONQUER THEIR OWN FEARS AND OVERCOME WHATEVER OBSTACLE THEY MAY FACE IN LIFE?
Yes, Ms Annie.. Sometimes, a MOTHER’S LOVE will never be enough to protect them.. But we, as Moms, have already raised them well enough to KNOW the DIFFERENCE between RIGHT and WRONG.. It all comes down to the kind of CHOICES that our children will make in their lives..
Choices which at first may seem right for them, only to find out in the end that the very same choices they made are the ones that would lead them to their own downfall..
Life is already tough enough for us parents.. But it gets tougher for our kids as they grow older..
Sadly, we cannot always be there to PROTECT them from the dangers that lurk in the outside world.. They, as young adults, will have to learn from their own mistakes, to boldly face each problem that they may encounter in their everyday lives, and to learn to rise above it all with their dignity intact..
We are all living on borrowed time, and we have to make the BEST and the MOST of this life that we were given..
YOU HAVE RAISED UR CHILDREN WELL, Ms Annie.. Your UNCONDITIONAL LOVE for Oyen and Nyke are the BEST GIFTS u have given them..
They may sometimes lose their way, but they will ALWAYS FIND A WAY BACK INTO YOUR HEART.. ❣❣❣
God bless u and the family, Ms Annie.. Have a Merry Christmas.. ❣❣❣
Maraming salamat Pam. I couldn’t have said it better myself.
Hi Ms. Annie. I am a passive reader of your blog for more than a year now. Just cant help reacting to this post as I am a mother too and this is also my concern. Khalil Gibran’s writing on children is spot on and I want to share it with you.
And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, “Speak to us of Children.”
And he said:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Dear Rea,
You are right, it’s spot on. Thanks for this.
This piece of yours reminds me of the saying: “Mothers hold their children’s hands for a short while, but their hearts forever.” You raised your children well but there are some lessons that they must learn on their own. Keep well An.
Dear Alvin and Mildred,
Happy New Year.