There were many things that have changed since I’ve been gone. Here are just a few:
1. There’s now a bigger sized sorbetes for forty pesos.
2. We have a new landline telephone unit. I love that the numbers are screaming at my face. They’re so big. The screen is also big. #thankyouhusband
We used to have high tech telephone gadgets at home. Wireless pa. It was too complicated like an office PABX. The maids had a heydey using the phones, bringing them inside the maid’s room.
We discarded those phones and replaced them with a basic telephone.
2. My husband let go of my 3 year driver before Christmas because he allegedly barged into the maids room at 5 in the morning and started kissing this young maid, telling her “hubadin mo baro mo” (take off your clothes). The maid claimed he tried to rape her. I believed that he kissed her and asked her to undress but I didn’t believe that he would rape her. She probably flirted with him and he took the bait. The other maid also reported that whenever he drives for her to the market, hinihimas daw legs nya.
3. I have a new driver. He is older than the one fired. He underwent one week training at EDSA in preparation for my arrival. Okay naman sya. Mabagal lang and he is poor in directions. Mahilig bumusina.
I have never experienced making so many U-turns in one day. Pag-sinabi kong ikanan mo dyan, dire-diretso pa rin. U-turn na naman kami. Pag sinabing ikaliwa, ikakanan naman, U-turn na naman. I told him to go straight, then turn left at the end of the road, he made a U-turn kasi daw wala ng kalye. Meron pa, diretso. Since I still have jet-lag, I dosed off, before I knew it, we were already in Magallanes, instead of exiting at C5.
In Taguig:
A—- O, bawal mag-U-turn dyan, yung susunod na kanto, kumanan ka, dun ka maghanap ng pwede nating likuan.
He went straight, he didn’t turn right.
A—-O, walang U-turn nga, dumiretso ka na lang.
A—-O, wag kang mag-U-turn, bawal nga, nakahalang tayo sa kalye, dumiretso ka.
He stopped, kinabig ang manubela paakyat ng bangketa and nag-U-turn din.
At J.P. Rizal Avenue:
I was talking on the phone when I noticed all the other vehicles were coming our way, ONE WAY!!! Mababangga tayo!!! Bumalik ka!!! U-turn na naman.
After making that big mistake, he asked me again, “Mam, left turn tayo”.
A—“Di ba nagkamali na tayo kanina? alam na nating one way bakit uulitin mo pa?”
Grrrrr.
4. I have a new aide de camp. Okay naman sya so far.
I interviewed him syempre, getting to know each other.
He served in the army for 10 years. He left the service and worked as one of the bodyguards of a government official.
A—-“O bakit ka umalis dun?”
P—-“Pinalitan kami lahat mam. Binigyan sya ni Pres. Duterte ng mga pulis”.
A—-“Ilang taon ka sa kanya?”
P—-“Pitong taon mam”.
A—-“Saan sya nakatira?”
P—–“Apat mam ang bahay nya”.
Dapat pipi ang mga bodyguards. Not good kung mahilig magkwento.
