Of course, why marry someone you cannot converse with?
But remember this, when couples are dating, they talk, they converse for long hours, they listen and understand every word each other say. They, truly, sincerely, listen. That’s when they are dating. They can talk about the most mundane things and they find every topic amusing.
Remember the old commercial? Talk and Listen?
Sadly, I find it hard to believe that it still exists. It’s now text and read.
If you want to communicate with the person in the other room, instead of talking, just text, and he/she would surely read it and maybe respond, thru texts.
But try to strike a conversation, he/she would not be focusing on you, he/she would be reading messages, watching videos, on their cellphones, while pretending to be listening to you. But it’s hardly so.
We’ve lost the ability to communicate. It’s not about being able to articulate deeply intellectual topics. It could be the simplest of our thoughts and emotions, how we are feeling today, what we are thinking, imagining. Or we just simply want to share something that is in our minds, good, bad, trivial, positive, negative, or whatever is occupying our mind at that very moment, we just want to blurt it out, share it.
But for that to become possible, we need someone who would listen. Thoughtfully, sincerely, listen. Not someone who just pretends to have heard you. If you stop in the middle of your sentence and that person didn’t even notice you stopped, what is the obvious fact? That person is not interested to communicate with you because he/she cannot participate in the simplest form of communicating—- LISTENING.
Couples who have lost the ability to engage in a simple person-to-person conversation without going into an argument no longer should be living together. They should go their separate lives. They clearly are no longer together in the real sense of the word. They have become strangers in their own worlds.
I dedicate this post to Chard and Alley.
