What I know is that there are two kinds of love in general, conditional and unconditional. Conditional is the kind of love you have for your parents, siblings, spouses, friends, neighbors, etc. Unconditional is the kind of love parents have for their children. There are of course those who give their love unconditionally to their whole family, or to someone other than their own children. Those are not covered here.

I will give two real-life examples:

1.

A couple, aka Mr. & Mrs. Evanson, both successful in their careers lived in a mansion in Oakland Hills with a panoramic view of the Bay Bridge and the spectacular San Francisco skyline. The husband is a lawyer and the wife is a medical doctor. They have two children, a daughter who is married to a British, and the son who is gay and living in with a partner.

Mr. & Mrs. Evanson was very frugal. Never traveled outside of the USA. Never went to the casinos. The doctor didn’t indulge in luxury handbags and not fond of expensive jewelry either. They saved all their earnings. The only luxuries they have were expensive cars and their big house. They saved their earnings for their daughter and son.

The daughter and her husband don’t have jobs. They live in a modest house not far from their parents’. They come to visit every weekend to get grocery items from their mother’s huge pantry. The daughter also expects to receive cash every weekend for their sustenance, mostly for entertainment.

The Evansons are also the ones paying for the grand kid’schooling.

The gay son doesn’t visit his parents on a regular basis, only during special holidays and only stays to eat then leave. Yes, his apartment is paid for by his parents. It is not clear what he does for a living.

Mr. Evanson retired from law practice after he was diagnosed with cancer of the lungs. He passed away last year. His wife also retired from medical practice to spend more time with Mr. Evanson.

Their two children prompted Mrs. Evanson to sell their Oakland Hills mansion. The net proceeds of almost $1,600,000 were split between the two children. The mother is now renting a small apartment by herself.

Her kids don’t visit her regularly. She has not seen her son and daughter for months. She no longer has a huge pantry for her daughter’s weekly shopping for free.

2.

He married a lawyer. She is successful and earns around $200,000 a year. He relegated himself to doing the household works and caring for their two children. He gave his full support to his wife and allowed her to pursue her career goals without any impediment of housebound-work. He gave up his own career to be a house-husband.

Husband does all the cooking, marketing, laundry, cleaning, shuttling the kids to and from school, doing home-works, etc. She comes home expecting good food laid out on the table, crisp-ironed dresses, polished shoes, clean towels, clean bathrooms, etc.

She started coming home late at night (pre-covid) and the husband got suspicious. When he asked her, she snarled back at him, telling him to just focus on his job as house-husband anyway she provided for all their keep.

He became even more suspicious when instead of driving to work, someone picked her wife up in a Tesla. When she came back that evening, he casually asked who the guy was, she said another lawyer from their office. She alleged that they went hiking with their workmates. Her husband remembered she wasn’t wearing hiking shoes nor a sports shirt. He couldn’t sleep that night feeling so jealous and insecure.

The next morning, his wife told him that she didn’t like him asking her who she was with nor where she was going. He said he has the right to ask because she’s his wife. No, she answered back. She said ” I am not your wife, I am your provider!”

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